FYI

I'm going on an overnight business trip tomorrow.

See you Friday.

Valuable Piece of Information

Get a Live Person

My BP sent this to me because he knows I'm impatient

Cooking with Emma

We go to this good Thai restaurant and I love their basil beef dish. I tried to replicate it at home and it’s very good. I made it yesterday for dinner, and I’ll have the leftovers for lunch today!



My Thai Basil Beef w/ Jasmine Rice

Ingredients

One pound or so good steak (I use sirloin) Cut into bite sized pieces (You can also make this with boneless chicken)
1 yellow pepper, thinly sliced
1 red pepper, thinly sliced
1 small yellow onion, thinly sliced
2 cloves garlic, thinly sliced
1 small can of coconut milk (I use low fat) (Find it on the Asian foods aisle)
1 ¼ cups uncooked jasmine rice
1 small can of chicken stock/broth

1 tablespoon curry powder (I use red curry)
I teaspoon cumin
1/8 teaspoon (dash) of cinnamon
1 teaspoon red pepper flakes
1 tablespoon Kosher salt
1 teaspoon fresh ground black pepper
½ cup fresh chopped basil
olive oil


About one hour before:
Marinate the steak with about two tablespoons of olive oil and half of the curry powder and half the black pepper. Refrigerate.

For the rice:
Put a tablespoon of olive oil in the bottom of a hot pan. Add rice. Stir, coating the rice for about a minute. Add chicken stock and two tablespoons of the coconut milk. Bring to a boil. Cover, reduce heat to low until the rice is cooked through.


In a large saute pan:

Put the marinated steak into the hot pan and sear on both sides (about a minute on each side). Set aside in a bowl. Then in the same pan over medium heat, add about a tablespoon of olive oil and then add the peppers, onions and garlic. Cook for about five minutes, stirring occasionally. Add the rest of the curry powder, cumin, salt, cinnamon, pepper and the rest of red pepper flakes. Add the steak back in. Add the remaining coconut milk and stir. Cover and cook through on low heat for about ten minutes. A minute before serving stir in the basil. Serve with the rice.

I sent a nastygram to Oprah

I don’t watch Oprah on a daily basis, but I did happen to catch it on Friday. The topic was “Class in America.” Great topic, but the show really sucked. The producer should be fired.

She had on Clinton’s Secretary of Labor Robert Reich (looking very gnomish by the way). Oprah kept him in an audience chair. He told us what we all know. 80-90% of this country’s wealth is in the hands of 1% of the people. The middle class is shrinking. More poor in America. “The American Dream” is no longer attainable for everyone.

So instead of a good discussion, the show highlighted three or four vapid women who said that they generalized the “lower class” were people with non-designer bags, dressly poorly and had dirty fingernails. One wailed that people looked down on her even though she drove a BMW because she was a hostess in a high-end restaurant. Waaaaaaaaa. Big fucking deal.
I was waiting for Miss Oprah to say, “Hey! Wait a second. There are many many people out there with dirty ingernails who are honest, hard working and have great character. But she didn’t say a word.
There was one lower working class black guy who said that he felt invisible. The only legitimate comment of the show.


Some snot-nosed heir to the Johnson & Johnson fortune was on hawking his film, and he admitted that, yes, he would be disappointed if he was cut out of his father’s will. SHOCKER.
Also Warren Buffet’s granddaughter was on (both she and the Johnson kid got to sit by Oprah, btw.) She told the harrowing tale of not getting a penny from her grandfather. (Although he paid her way through college so she could do whatever she wanted.)

What could have been an interesting and informative show was a real mess.

Fact: The Assistant to the Regional Manager Doll is Here

You can preorder a Dwight K. Schrute Bobblehead doll from the NBC.com shop. There is a God.

The lawn

Yesterday was the first lawn mowing of the season. It’s been LP’s job for the last two years. Instead of boring old, neat, straight-line mowing, my inventive son mows in circles, on angles, leaves big clumps here and there, and doesn’t do a very good job at trimming where the mower won’t go. But at least it’s mown. There are other things to worry about.

Calendars

I may be one of the few people left who uses a paper calendar and not my Outlook calendar. I write down my appointments, doctor’s appointments, LP’s trips to his orthodontists, birthdays, anniversaries, etc. I don’t like Outlook. I don’t trust Outlook. My non-Outlook savvy boss accidentally sent me 53 outlook appointments when he was attempting to change meeting times from Eastern to Daylight Savings a few weeks back. They just kept coming and coming, so I emailed him with a “JUST STOP IT!!!”

Anyway, there are pithy quotations in my spiral bound desk calendar.

“Nothing was ever achieved without enthusiasm.”—Ralph Waldo Emerson

On paper this sounds inspirational. But think about it. It’s really bullshit. People achieve things all day long and aren’t necessarily enthused about doing so.

“Any activity becomes creative when the doer cares about doing it right, or doing it better.”—John Updike

Again, this is bullshit. Certain activities and jobs are drudge no matter what. How can the job of ditch-digging become creative even though the digger wants to do it right? It reminds me of the Sandra Bullock character in While You Were Sleeping. Towards the end of the movie she’s lamenting her job as a subway token taker. “I sit here, day after day, in this box—like a veal" haha.

And, no, this post has no point.

Gnomes and whiskey barrels

My youngest sister’s birthday is May 4 and I asked her what she wanted. She wanted some rubberized garden shoes. She told me Target had them. YAY! They had shoes (kind of like Porky’s pink shoes, only cloggier) in blue, orange and yellow. I choose the orange and also got her a good pair of garden gloves in an orange stripe. Cute!

Guess what else they had?? That’s right—garden gnomes!!! Yippeeeeeee. Cast Iron. Heavy. Adorable. One holding a shovel and one holding a flower pot, so I got them both. (stfu, jhd)

Last week BP and I went to Rural King (kind of a white trash Lowe’s/ Menard’s combo.) He was looking at tools (what else?) and I spied half whiskey barrels. The real deal. Not the phoney baloney faux whiskey barrels like Wally World sells. Big 40 pound whiskey barrels. Regular priced $15.99, now only $12.99. I sweet-talked BP into coming back with his truck to buy some for me.

BP: How many do you want?
Me: Just one.
Me: No two.
Me: Oh, get three.


So he did and they’re still in the back of his truck until the painters are finished with the porch and windows. They smell like whiskey. When I figure out where they’re going in the yard, I’m going to fill the bottoms with empty soda cans, packing peanuts, etc and just the top half with potting mix. Two barrels will get a gnome! I want to fill one with different varieties of coleus, one with herbs (thymes, rosemaries, basils—not Meme’s doggie, and Italian flat leaf parsley) and one with annuals like snapdragons and dahlias. But maybe I’ll change my mind when I go to the nurseries. But that’s the plan right now. I might even do heirloom tomatoes in one.

Backyard Tree & Dead Lawn

This is a tree in our backyard. I used to know what the name was--it's an ornamental Chinese something or other. My now deceased neighbor lady hated the way the blossoms smelled, but they have no odor to me. I think they're pretty. The dead patch in the lawn is from two bags of mulch I laid there in the autumn and forgot about. I moved them so the grass will soon spread.

DreamyUK sent these funnies to me!

Easter Dinner

We’re going to my oldest sister’s house for Easter. I think most everyone will be there. This year I’m the some-sort-of-salad, and dessert person. I think I’ll make a chocolate cake, but I’m not sure what kind of salad I’ll bring—probably either a Greek salad with lots of kalamata olives and feta, or an orzo pasta salad with tomatoes and a lemony dressing.
Are you bringing anything interesting to your Easter dinner?

How I maintain my 500 pound girth

Dove ice cream bars are delicious

Act now!

Powerball drawing for Wednesday is $220 million dollars. Shelfers in good Emmerica standing may email me a number between one and fifty-five. I’ll buy the ticket(s). If I win the jackpot on the Shelfer ticket, the people participating will split two million dollars. I’ll email you with the numbers once the ticket is purchased. You must email me a number no later than 5 pm on Tuesday April 11th.
Good luck.

Great Battery

Our backporch smoke detector just started beeping Friday, April 7. I had forgotten we even had one back there. BP changed the battery in it. He brought the old battery to me to look at. "Guess when the last time the battery was changed," he asked. I didn't know. I told him that I had forgotten we even had a smoke detector by the back door.

He always writes the date he puts the battery in on the battery itself.The old battery's date was MAY 28, 2001!!!!FIVE FREAKING YEARS that battery lasted! It was an Energizer E Titanium. I know it's not suggested that a battery is kept in a smoke detector for FIVE years, but isn't it great that it lasted so long???


I suggest blu and Porky use this type of battery in their Turbo Rabbits.

All's well

Big Puddin repaired my Travelocity gnome with superglue so all's right with the world. He's back up where he belongs on my computer desk near the printer, the Glade and the potted faux plant.

I love you

The other day a woman was in my office when LP called. After a brief conversation I ended with, “Ok. I love you. Bye.” Whereas she said, “If you say ‘I ‘love you’ too much it lessens it.”

WTF??

I always end phone conversations with the Puddins, my Mom, and most of my sisters with an “I love you.” Who knows if those are the last words they’ll hear from you. I don’t think you can ever say, and mean, those words enough.

Katie Couric

I have never gotten the fascination with Katie Couric. Who cares if she moves to CBS? I like Bob Schieffer. Katie’s not a journalist. She’s a question-asker. These news personalities get paid way too much money.

And now for something completely different

On Wednesday morning (for a second) it will be 1:02:03 am on 04/05/06

If you miss it, anticipate this: 1:02:03 pm on 04/05/06

Hey, I read it in the paper and thought I’d pass it along (shrug)

Wanted: A Decaying Deer Head

I’m having some people paint our house trim, soffits, columns and porch. A light blue for the trim and a dark blue for the porch deck It’s been rainy and rainy. They began scraping and priming last week when it was decent outside. All we’re waiting for is a stretch of nice weather in the 60s.

Yesterday I de-crapped the front porch. Chairs, cushions, plant pots, shells, tables, watering cans, etc. I put them in a pile in the front yard near the bird bath. It kinda looks like Aunty’s house sans mannequins and paper mache (sp) animals. All I need is a decaying deer head to complete the ensemble.

Send up a prayer to the tornado gods and tell them to back off for a few weeks!

Assorted daffodils in my yard